I’ve texted you, called you. Tried every possible thing I can think of to get a hold of you. I don’t know…I..I’m afraid. Everyone says I should just let go…like ripping off a band-aid. I can’t. I don’t know how. Do you know how much pain that would cause us both? Think about it. I can cut people out of my life easily with no explanation if they’ve done something terrible to me…but you haven’t. YOU HAVEN’T!!! Many people would turn that to “you haven’t done anything to upset me too horribly as of this year” but I say you haven’t done anything to make me deliriously happy. Everything is false hope…but I can’t let go. I just can’t. I don’t care what anybody says. I can’t close our chapter in my life. Maybe someday I’ll be able to but right now? I feel kind of lonely without your texts but I have too much of my own stuff to deal with that my philosophy is you’ll talk when you’re ready. I can wait for a text but I’m not freaking out and not sleeping because you aren’t texting me.