Last week I got a notification. Sadly I didn’t notice till now. It’s been four years since I registered here on WordPress. I’ve made lots of friends, followed many inspiring blogs, and made a little niche for myself here. Despite how barren and empty it may seem as I haven’t felt anything post worthy in a while, I hope you’ll continue to follow me.
Society and its demands of the populous has reached a peak of ridiculousness and it must be stopped.
- Where does it say anywhere that a woman or a man for that matter must like boys or girls romantically or sexually? Despite the fact that gay marriage is now legal in the USA, many people continue to make a stink about it. Homosexuality, heterosexuality, asexuality, all types of sexuality and gender definition are perfect! People are who they are and their decisions shouldn’t be any one elses opinion except for those they trust if they feel like talking about it. It doesn’t effect you!! Who are you to say two gays can’t marry, or for that matter that anyone has to get married?! If you don’t like it, keep it to yourself instead of trying to poison the human race with your bigotry and stupidity.
- SHOW ME WHERE THE FUCK IN THE CONSTITUTION OR BILL OF RIGHTS IT SAYS WOMEN HAVE TO DRESS A CERTAIN WAY. Regardless of how a woman dresses, getting raped or assaulted is never her fault. She wasn’t asking for it. Not in the way she looked, acted, or was dressed. It’s the mans fault and always will be. Men are pigs. They can’t keep it in their pants and being taught or drilled into their heads by society that it’s ok to rape or assault anyone is not ok by any means!!!!!
- Vaccinating your kids. Public and private schools require you to vaccinate your kids before they can be enrolled. That’s just the way it is. If you don’t want to vaccinate your kids for whatever reason, you should realize you’re doing them way more harm than good.Until you agree to vaccinate your kids, they won’t be gettin an education through any public or private school system. So get ready to homeschool them!
- Voting. It is a right through the constitution and you should preform your civic duty for the good of the nation. Your opinion counts and is considered greatly. We live in a democracy where the government is chosen by the people, for the people. Without votiong, there would be anarchy. Ultimately it’s your decision of course but you should understand the mistake you’re making by not voting.
- Politics. Regardless of any research you may have, DO NOT SHOVE YOUR VIEWS DOWN ANYONES THROAT!!!! You may however, engage in a respectful no holds barred debate.
- Abortion. this is a tricky subject as we all have our views. Myself personally, I have a mixed opinion. For one: abortion is murder. Why would you want to murder the thing growing inside you? Over those months you’ll get very attached. The flipside to this is if a woman is raped. You’ll have anger, feelings of hopelessness and invasion. You may feel as though you can’t live with a constant memory of what happened to you. You may wish to abort your baby. This is your decision and no one elses and that’s ok.
Of my Top Ten most viewed posts in 2015, six of them were posted in the eighteen months before. This could mean that a large amount of what I created last year was rubbish. Or, (as I like to put a positive slant on things), it could be because these six particular posts remain relevant […]
Those of you who follow me on Pinterest may have noticed the amount of things I regularly re-pin on my ‘Desserts’ board. In fact, I can quite easily spend hours salivating over beautiful recipes, making a promise to myself that one day, I would actually bother to try them. Unfortunately, I’m no Nigella, and while […]
Source: tiny beautiful things
Over the three and a half years I’ve had this blog I’ve realized big things. I’ve learned a lot about myself, about others, about the way we see each other. Many times I’ve though of giving up on this blog, scrapping it, and starting anew. I guess I’m tired of not being authentic, of censoring myself, of all the doctoring I do constantly. A few of the blogs I follow have touched on this themselves and I guess it’s their way of saying that they’re passing the torch and so it’s my turn.
I have these words inside me screaming to come out. I want to be an open book. I’m tired of censoring myself. I may lose followers (I hope not) but it’s a risk I’m willing to take.
I won’t bore you with the way most stories start “Once upon a time” and ending with a hearty “And they lived happily ever after”. No that’s not how this is going to go. Sit down, grab some coffee because this is going to be quite a ride!
Stories start with “once upon a time” and end with “And they lived happily ever after” or something similar but this isn’t a story. I can’t just snap my fingers and make everything OK.
I had a relatively happy childhood (as told to me by my mother). That’s how you know this post is going to get deep. Like 7 ways to Sunday, 6 feet under deep. Let this sink in… I don’t remember much of my childhood. I remember weird things like the color of my baby blanket, what laying in the cold tube of a CT scan machine felt like, the colors in the rooms of the house my grandparents owned in upstate New York. Stuff like that. Weird considering I was only three at the time.
The first concrete thing I remember after that?…
My mom owned a little gift shop in the center of town. (I think of it as the center of town anyway) She sold candles, jewellery, glass pieces, candles, toys for kids, etc. Sometimes I’d go in after school and help out. Understand, I couldn’t do much but I’d organize candles on shelves and put price tags on things. It was awesome, tons of fun.
After that? Nothing vivid or in color until I was thirteen. My parents were fighting and eventually got divorced (though I don’t remember much of the fighting). I had two hutches and I remember seeing them both as I got ready for bed one night and the next morning one was gone. I kid you not. For some reason that’s the memory I have but that isn’t how it happened, at least to my knowledge.
Then the eight years of emotional, narcissistic, physical, and at times bordering on sexual (incredibly inappropriate) abuse began. Why would someone who is supposed to care about me do such a thing? When people ask if I have a dad, I say no but I do have a biological father. He and my abuser are one in the same.
When I turned 21, I left his house. Best decision I ever made. Unfortunately, I still worked for him. I should’ve quit my job then too.I wish now that I could block him out. I haven’t spoken to him in over two years.
Now I’m a quarter of a century old. I live with my mom. I’m trying to put my past behind me. Each day I feel like I get further away but sometimes I feel ashamed. This whole thing could have gone differently. I wish I had known then what I know now.
Now you know my story. I didn’t post this looking for sympathy. I posted it to show that below the facade of my posts, is the deeper part of me that I need to bring to the surface.
My mom and I had been living with a roommate for what was a little over three years. During that time, I learned a lot about myself. Mostly through how our roommate treated and talked to me. She made me realize that my brain injury at birth is not something to be ashamed of (though I did feel ashamed during her stay). Sometimes she made me feel overly irritated and indignant. It made me realize I’m single because I WANT to be. Trying to deal with extroverts and people in general is rather difficult for me because I’m so guarded. I’m tired of people thinking that talking down to me is OK, or that I’m “slow” Despite the fact that I’m overly guarded and may make a person think I’m cold and uncaring, that couldn’t be further from the truth. I’m just tired of assumptions, I’m tired of people looking down at me, trying to talk to me and seeing that if I can’t grasp a concept there must be something wrong with me.
I may not be incredibly intelligent but that doesn’t give you the right to flaunt your know how about something and tell me my opinion doesn’t matter or that I’m wrong. That also doesn’t give you the right to sound so shocked that I may not know something.
There’s a reason why I choose to not be around people much. I don’t trust easily and I’m sick of being babied. I’m tired of people thinking I’m slow or that I don’t understand things. That doesn’t mean don’t talk to me!
Don’t be convinced that just because I may not understand something, it means I don’t have an opinion or you’re automatically right by default. I have an opinion! I may not have facts to back it up but I’m wise in some ways beyond my years. Before dismissing me, realize I may be right once in a while
I passed 400 posts few weeks ago, but I didn’t notice till now! I know I rarely have much to say these days. I feel like I have to censor and leave things out. Not get too personal. I miss being able to get deep into things like I did back when I started. I’m going to try harder to get back to the beginnings normalcy. I don’t like censorship and leaving things out because I want to be honest about myself.
Almost twelve hours into the new year and I’m cuddled up on the couch while my cat sleeps at my feet. I don’t know what this year will bring but I know I want to become a better person than I was last year. This year, as is every year is full of possibilities and wonder. Here we should take time from every day to pause and reflect on how we feel, where we came from, and where we are going. Our goals shouldn’t be a destination but a journey. Remember always (I wish I could take my own advice), that you are enough. Of course we should all try to improve ourselves but when we feel hopeless and down we should all remember that we are enough.
I unsubbed from WoW till Legion hits. I’m kind of sad about it but I only had it so I could post on the forums. Lately I haven’t felt any reason to log in. I’ll see everyone when Legion hits 🙂